What is Domestic Violence?

A pattern of coercive tactics that are used to gain and maintain power and control in an ongoing, familiar relationship.

Forms of abuse include: psychological, emotional, physical, sexual and/or economic and may be used in combination
Abusers believe they are entitled to control how their victims think, feel and behave
Physical and sexual violence may be a component of the abuse but some victims are controlled through intimidation, threats, emotional and psychological abuse and isolation- no physical abuse is necessary
In an abusive relationship, one party fears the other and attempts to comply with the other’s wishes to avoid harm
Anyone can be a victim
Abuse occurs in all racial, ethnic, economic, religious groups, and across the lifespan
Domestic Violence is illegal- an adult can be arrested, charged, and convicted.

Abuse Tactics

A pattern of coercive tactics that are used to gain and maintain power and control in an ongoing, familiar relationship.

Controls what you do, who you see and where you go
Humiliates, demeans and/or ridicules you
Threatens to leave, divorce, commit suicide or institutionalize you
Slaps, hits, punches, burns, chokes you or throws things
Ignores or ridicules your religious and/or cultural traditions
Treats you like a servant
Steals your money, titles or possessions
Misleads other family members about extent and nature of illnesses and/or conditions
Takes your walker, wheelchairs, glasses, dentures
Is rough with your intimate body parts during care giving

What You Can Do If You Suspect Your Friend Is A Victim Of Abuse

Your friend will need to make their own decisions, but below are some suggestions on how you may help.

Do

Be gentle, but do be direct. Ask them if they are being abused. The victim might deny it, but at least they had the opportunity to talk.
Do leave the decision making to the victim. Don’t try to rescue them, but help them discover their own strengths and offer support.
Educate yourself about the problem of spouse abuse.
Let the victim know that there are alternatives. No one deserves to be abuse!
Tell them about the Personal Development Center.

Don't

Be judgemental.
Pry or Push. Be supportive and let them know you are willing to listen if they would like to talk about it.
Say, “Why don’t you just leave them?” The decision to stay or leave is not easy. Spouse abuse is a complex problem involving many issues.
Smother them with sympathy. That is disabling and may make them feel even less in control and capable.

A reporter of abuse has the right to remain anonymous.

Additional Information

Children of Domestic Violence

Facts

Domestic violence is devastating for children
Never the fault of children
Cannot be ended by children
Children are often unintended victims stuck in the middle of a situation beyond their control and understanding
When there is violence in the home, children do not develop and grow normally
Violence in your family has long-lasting and negative psychological, behavioral, and emotional effects

Parents Should Tell Their Children

Violence is never right, even when someone they love is being violent.
Neither you, nor they, are at fault or the cause of violence, and when anyone is being violent, it is important to stay safe.

Abuse in Late Life

Facts

Physical, sexual, emotional, verbal, or financial
Victims are 50 years of age or older
Often happens within a prior, ongoing, trusting relationship
The abuser can be a spouse/partner, adult child, grandchild, another family member or caregiver
Abuse may occur within the victim’s home or in a facility setting

Possible Signs of Abuse

Lack of food
Bruises or soiled clothing
Fearful or confusion
Isolation/loneliness
Unpaid bills

Women In Search of Empowerment (W.I.S.E.) Program

W.I.S.E. is an adult education and support group for women who share life experiences as they relate to abuse. General domestic abuse information, facilitated discussion, and participant concerns are addressed each session.

Topics Covered

Legal Issues
Financial Issues
Safety Issues
How to Handle Stress

AODA/Mental Health Information
Grief & Loss
Self-esteem
Conflict & Communication

Be informed: We provide displays at area events, as well as presentations to schools, businesses, and service organizations. If you would like to have a staff member attend your event or give a presentation, please contact us.

Helpful Links

Other Local Domestic Violence Agencies

The Women’s Community Inc.
Wausau, WI
The Family Center
Wisconsin Rapids, WI
Financial Help for women in Abusive Relationships

Abuse in Later Life Advocate

Community Information

Legal Information

Our Services

Adult Advocacy Program

Youth Advocacy Program

Elder Abuse

Classes and Support

Marshfield Office

505 East Depot St.
Marshfield, WI 54449

Phone: (715) 384-2971
24 hr. Crisis Line: (715) 384-2971
Fax: (715) 384-7826

Office Hours: Monday - Friday 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. or by appointment