Physical violence to another person usually has early signs such as: verbal abuse, bullying of others – particularly smaller and weaker persons, cruelty to animals, blaming others for one’s own problems/faults, general “macho” behavior.
Sometimes, men who batter women only do it one time; but, more often the battering becomes more severe and more frequent. There may be many promises made by the man who batters, never to abuse her again, and the woman may threaten to break off the relationship if it ever happens again. “Actions speak louder than words”. If the woman does not follow through on her threat to end the relationship, it is viewed by the man who batters as a “bluff”. Her threats become meaningless – her continued presence says to him that it’s okay to continue the violence.
There are many factors involved: His promises to never hit her again may be very convincing; she may feel she is the one and only person who understands him and can help him; she may “block out” and minimize the battering episodes and focus on the good times together; she may become falsely convinced that she causes his outburst or that she deserves the battering; she may be truly afraid and in terror of what he would do if she broke off the relationship.
Some children grow up in violent homes and, having seen the violence and the horrible consequences, will turn away from the violence. Many continue the violent patterns from the models of their parents. Men who batter often were abused themselves as children and/or witnessed their mothers being battered.
Men who batter women are the “Dr. Jekyll – Mr. Hyde” type. There is usually a recognizable “Cycle of Abuse”, with three stages, in violent relationships. The first stage is tension building, the second stage is the actual battering, and the third is the “I’m sorry. I love you. I’ll never do it again” stage. In general, the battering becomes more severe and more frequent unless intervention occurs.
W.I.S.E. is an adult education and support group for women who share life experiences as they relate to abuse. General domestic abuse information, facilitated discussion, and participant concerns are addressed each session.
Be informed: We provide displays at area events, as well as presentations to schools, businesses, and service organizations. If you would like to have a staff member attend your event or give a presentation, please contact us.
505 East Depot St.
Marshfield, WI 54449
Phone: (715) 384-2971
24 hr. Crisis Line: (715) 384-2971
Fax: (715) 384-7826
Office Hours: Monday - Friday 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. or by appointment